Loneliness can be a pervasive, invisible emotion that we all feel at some point. Everyone has different reasons for feeling down when they’re alone or even in the company of others – but if it keeps up long enough and isn’t addressed, loneliness can take its toll on our mental wellbeing.
Divorce or separation means letting go of some areas of your life that are no longer right for you and brings inevitable change. This can cause a blend of feelings including loneliness.
What causes loneliness after divorce?
Loneliness comes in many forms, yet divorce or separation can be a leading cause. Everyone experiences it differently and we must learn to recognize why each person may feel lonely so that they don’t have to face the burden alone.
Reasons for feeling lonely differ widely from person to person. However there are some common factors often brought about by divorce or separation:
- Separation from your children – the end of a relationship often means separation not only from your ex-partner, but from your children while they spend time with their other parent. In a relatively short space of time, you can go from living all together and seeing each other daily, to spending longer than you’re used to without your kids.
- Testing relationships – break-ups can impact your friendships and relationships with family members, especially those with a connection to your ex. The dynamics of your relationship may change, or in some cases you may lose contact altogether.
- A new place to call home – separation commonly means changing where you live. Moving to a different area, a new home, and perhaps living alone for the first time can lead to feeling isolated, a feeling that can be heightened if you also work from home.
- Occasionally lonely – you may no longer be able to share events and holidays that you’d once have celebrated with your ex-partner or family, which can lead to feeling alone.
Tips for dealing with loneliness
Experiencing divorce or separation can take an emotional toll, but it is important to find the strength within yourself to make sure you stay balanced. By taking time for reflection and self-care, you are well on your way to managing any feelings of loneliness that may arise during this difficult period in life.
Resurrecting hobbies
With the extra time that most of us find ourselves with right now, why not rekindle some old passions or take up a new hobby? From training for a triathlon to learning another language and more – your ‘one day’ list can start being realized today. Now is the perfect opportunity to set aside some quality time for activities you love (or have always wanted to try).
Create a new routine
Going through a breakup can be stressful, but it is also an opportunity to rethink and reinvent your daily routine. Instead of feeling disorientated by the loss of rhythm in life, why not create something new that takes into account what you are obligated to do while adding healthy habits as well as activities that make you feel fulfilled?
Reconnecting with friends
During a difficult time like after a break-up, friends can be the most comforting support system. This is an opportunity to reflect upon your relationships and determine who has been there for you when it matters most. Make meaningful plans with those you are happiest around, revive cherished friendships that have drifted apart and don’t shy away from breaking off ties if they no longer serve their purpose in bringing joy into your life – because everyone deserves true friendship! Devoting yourself towards developing authentic bonds will help bring solace during lonely moments.
Stop comparing
Comparing yourself to others in relationships can be a quick way to heighten your loneliness after break-ups, but it’s important not forget that what you see on the surface may often have depths beneath. Instead of worrying about trying to live up someone else’s seemingly ‘perfect life’, why not focus instead on creating happiness for yourself?
Get to know your triggers
Isolation and loneliness can be difficult to manage, but being mindful of what triggers these feelings is an important step. Maybe it’s a pattern of scrolling through social media or going home to an empty house that makes you feel down. Taking strides towards change one at a time will help steer your life in the direction of positivity – doing small things like eating out alone without feeling self-conscious could make all the difference!
Makes plans for the future
Feelings of loneliness can make life seem like there’s no escape. But by taking the reins and carving out your own path, you have the power to create a future filled with joy. Catch up over coffee or plan an adventure – spending time with loved ones is great but don’t forget that it’s beneficial to look within yourself too; setting goals only for you allows self-confidence grow!
Reach out
While processing a divorce can be an isolating experience, it’s crucial to not brush off your lonely feelings. If these emotions linger for too long they can take their toll on both mental and physical health; therefore we suggest reaching out to those you trust or seeking professional help if needed.