Meeting with a divorce lawyer for the first time can evoke a range of emotions, but it is important to be prepared and know what questions to ask. Knowing your rights while navigating through this difficult situation will help you gain confidence as you move forward in creating closure.
You may be feeling overwhelmed with the stress of your situation and concerned about entrusting a stranger to help you manage it. It takes courage to reach out, especially in times like these.
Don’t panic! Your first meeting with a lawyer should be a positive experience for you and in this blog, we will give you some tips on how to make the most of it.
What do you want to achieve?
The first question to ask yourself is what do you want to achieve,
- Are you wanting to know more about your rights and entitlements?
- Do you want to know what your next steps might be and what options are available to you?
- Do you already know quite a bit about the legal process and just want to check a few things out?
- Are you undecided as to whether this is the end of your relationship or not?
- Do you want to meet the person who will be your lawyer and assess whether that person is the right fit for you?
All these things can be achieved in your first meeting.
How to prepare for your first meeting with a divorce lawyer meeting
Your divorce lawyer will be eager to learn more about your family dynamic so they can help guide you through the challenging process ahead.
This will involve an account of what has led to you seeking advice and then information about your particular circumstances including your personal details, for example, name and address etc.
Married couples often have a significant and shared history, from the moment they started living together to any potential separations. We’d love to know yours! Could you tell us when your marriage began, as well as if applicable when you first moved in together?
If you have children and you are making arrangements with the other parent then, their names and ages are important but also think about what are the actual issues, what are your concerns and can you both reach an agreement without some support.
Financial matters can be complicated, and it’s important to get up-to-date on any assets or liabilities you may have. Who owns what property? Any debts in yours or your partner’s name that need addressing? Is anything secured against a mortgage? Familiarising yourself with all of these details is key for sorting out financial affairs properly.
Try to gather as much information as you can including values of investments, pensions and income HOWEVER do not go rifling through your spouse’s/partner’s personal papers to find out the information.
Come to the meeting only with what you already know and definitely do not bring any papers with you that do not belong to you.
Your first meeting with a divorce lawyer
So the day of the meeting has arrived, what can you expect from your first meeting with a divorce lawyer?
Taking the time to properly research a topic is beneficial for success. Having all of your facts straight can make sure you are prepared, no matter what lies ahead!
With your first meeting, you have the opportunity to set a course for what matters most. Outline and prioritize those issues that are important to you in order to create an image of success down the road.
However, you may have no idea at all and be lost in a fog. Don’t worry, that is where your lawyer can help you. If you do have some clear ideas, your lawyer can explain to you whether your expectations are realistic.
It is essential for your lawyer to have an understanding of the relationship between you and your ex. This information can give them insight into what options are available, as it will reveal if there has been any aggressive or controlling behaviour present.
When it comes to divorce proceedings, going the courtroom route isn’t always necessary. In fact, many cases are settled without ever having to worry about judges and hearings. That’s why when choosing a lawyer for that sensitive time in your life, you want them with the full range of options at their disposal – from mediation and collaborative law to negotiation. Above all else: trust is key!
You should expect to receive information on what the legal processes involve though don’t expect to get a blow by blow account of what is involved. There is a danger that you can be overloaded with too much technical information that makes you feel more bamboozled than when you first walked into the office.
At the end of the meeting
It is important that you leave the meeting better informed than when you went in.
I cannot promise that all the information you receive will be good news or what you believe you are entitled to. Remember what you think is fair and reasonable may not be shared by your ex.
Any advice you receive should always be realistic and practical based on the information available at that time.